Is Gay Marriage Destroying the United Methodist Church?

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Update (June 13): Nearly 90 Methodist conservatives have signed a response to the unity proposal by prominent pastor Adam Hamilton and other progressives, claiming it “will only extend, localize and exacerbate the acrimonious debate over the issue. “”Irreconcilable” disagreement over same-sex unions is once again prompting debate over splitting the historic United Methodist Church (UMC), one of America’s largest denominations.”If we are one church, we cannot act as if we are two. If, in reality, we are two churches, it may not be wise to pretend any longer that we…

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Lessons from Successful Marriages

This article is excerpted from the NY times national bestseller, “The Truth about Cheating.” The author studied hundreds of men, faithful and unfaithful, to discover how women could create better relationships for themselves.Here’s a simple secret that I’ve shared with thousands of couples in therapy and in my seminars: successful couples accentuate the positive and diminish the negative, and failed couples accentuate the negative and diminish the positive.Failed couples tend to think that their failure is justified because of the spouse they married. They perceive successful couples as having an…

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What’s Behind Successful Marriages?

As I sipped my Starbucks and browsed the “Marriage” section at Barnes and Noble, a large, glossy, coffee-table book caught my eye. It was titled The Greatest Weddings of All Time. It featured media stars like Prince Charles and Princess Diana, Marilyn Monroe and Joe DiMaggio, Ted Turner and Jane Fonda. As I thumbed through the book, I thought how sad it was that most of these marriages didn’t last very long. That’s probably why the book celebrates great weddings instead of great marriages.Many of these couples apparently had no…

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Why Marriages Fail: Negative Interpretations

Why do marriages fail? While the answers to that question are many, and often complex, there is a growing body of research suggesting there are four risk factors that can hinder a relationship and increase a couple’s likelihood for marital failure. In one key study, researchers followed a sample of 135 couples for twelve years, starting before they were married. The researchers were able to differentiate those couples who do well from those who do not, with up to 91% accuracy.* Crucial to the success of any marriage is for…

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Husbands Must Focus On Being Lovers

Twenty-five years ago next month, my bride and I exchanged our wedding vows of lifelong commitment to one another. Over the past quarter century together (22 years of which I’ve been a pastor), we’ve watched with sadness as the marriages of many friends and acquaintances have hit the skids. While each couple is unique, I’ve noticed some common errors that have led to divorce.One of the most common problems is the passive (that’s a nice way of saying “wimp”) husband. He assumes that his marriage and family life will run…

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